Sounding off

Hey got something to get off my chest,

Been doing online reading on my diagnoses on a few things. As I have been questioned on or heard people wondering what is up with me.

How I act and interact with people is strange but functional. I know this a million times over. I only address it like this when it is important to me for all of you to know.

Sadly, every few years I am called out or disregarded in general. I really don't care too much about it. Not like I can throw a switch and oh everything is normal.

I wish what I have was silly and dumb and fake as over the years people have claimed.  I can't fake what I have or keep it hidden. Unless you talk to me about what I have going on, whatever you hear is to be taken with a great deal of bs and rumour.

Awareness is a big part of my life, I sleep thinking about it and do it daily with people as I have to to represent myself. I have grown tough skin and I cope in ways that boogle most people including Doctors and other medical Professionals.

Honestly confront me, awareness starts with hearing seeing and understanding. I try to do what I can, if that is not good enough for you that is your problem cause i will gladly trade for an hour what I have for an hour of peace.

The other thing, I am damn tired of hurtful words coming from good people about other good people. It is the same thing in the end and should be no surprise that everyone talks or thinks about others, all the time. Only difference is some people have respect of what their words may do to others. Others do not. So enough is enough.

Yes, I am guilty of it as well cause bloody shocking I am no angel. But I do it so rarely and in response to the small bit I hear said about me. It make me sick and stressed when I do it cause it hurts to say anything. IT HURTS people bloody remember that.

Well there you have it.

Sandman out.

It is time to begin a new era.

Hey hey,

Hello the Sandman is back.

And is time to for a new piece of creative work to be shared.

I have a different spiritual path to most people out there. I feel it every second I am awake and see it in my dreams at night.

God is only part of the spiritual realm many people walk. And that is fine to believe what you will is a hope and meaning to live a brighter and fuller life.

It is not my cup of tea but I honour that which has been created the earth and nature that inhabits it. No religion is perfect each has it's good points and bad.

I is only important to hold hope and peace in your heart that matters, even if it is only the belief that you yourself is the only thing that matters.

Everyone walks where they do it is not my place to judge but to walk in my own direction and journey my own journey.

So I give you my latest poem that some of you have seen before but now it should be shared.

The Path Less taken

I am an Autistic Pagan, places, sights and sounds are important to most people. But everything for me is brighter, louder and more intense.

I get lost in what I am doing, where I am, where I am going, but not who I am.

I will always jump at the chance to go a place in Nature, it is like a comfort blanket, the energy, you can pull around you, be one with the land, be one with yourself, be truly safe at home.

My magic, comes from my heart, through creative means, an instinct of thought, sometimes wishes and wants. But always to share in what I know as it is not me to deny others the chance to know and learn.

I do not have need for the groups or enclaves, my stories, ideas are always floating in my head, joining a group means I need to decode and adjust and make sense of things no one else could ever understand.

I live ritual each day from Sun up, to Sun Down please do not get upset when you explain it to me and how it is always to be and I tell you to stuff it. I am the ritual, and this life is mine.

Why is it always a feeling, chained down with rules when the simple things are enough. The concrete jungle can have drama, noise, dull grey buildings. None of this helps me live in the second I breakdown.

My solutions you can not find in a book or app, it might seem odd and that is ok. The dirt I hold in my hand might mean more than all the treasure you can possibly find.

I am an Autistic Pagan watch the beauty of my mind unwind.